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Feet To My Faith

~ Therefore, though we are always confident and know that while we are at home in the body we are away from the Lord— 7 for we walk by faith, not by sight —

Feet To My Faith

Category Archives: suffering

Update on Insanity!

28 Monday Jun 2010

Posted by Dianna in faith, move, suffering

≈ 1 Comment

I’m sorry its been so long since my last update. So many things have happened (or NOT happened, depending on how you look at it) I didn’t even want to think about them let alone share them!

In my last post we were getting ready to close on the house. The movers were coming on the seventh and all was plugging along nicely. Sadly while I watched the movers cart all our stuff out of the house I got a call telling us we weren’t going to close. Actually that was the beginning of a pretty bad week. The bank just turned down the house and wouldn’t loan anything for it. Short explanation is that it is a unique rural property that just didn’t fit any set criteria to judge value. Banks don’t like things that don’t fit the prescribed mould and we were toast. The buyers went to another bank and after several circus like hoops to jump through the house is due to close this afternoon. In one hour and 15 minutes to be exact. I won’t be calm until I get the word that all is signed and DONE!!!

I will say this process has certainly been a growing experience. I know that God has planned this move for us. It is solely in His very cape able hands. I guess my humanness just jumps out and expects that when God is in control things will go smoothly and we won’t struggle. God has certainly taught us in all that. I KNOW He is in control with every part of me. But this has been HARD, and to be completely honest I am so tired of things being hard. I’m ready for some easy:) God didn’t promise us easy though, I’m sure Paul was wishing for some easy when he sat in his prison cell. At least I hope he was. That would make me feel better!

Spending time in scripture has been my lifesaver. Every time I feel myself starting to stress I would just focus on getting back into the word. Even when I was running to ballgames and the grocery store etc. I was thinking about when I was going to next get a chance to be back reading my Bible. Not doing in depth study on the faithfulness of God or anything, just reading. I started to read Job. Bad idea. If I wasn’t stressed before that about pushed me over the edge. My friend Nancy sent me to Psalm 107. That was such a great chapter to read through. I used Psalm 106:48 for a status on Facebook the other day. It brought me great joy and a few “Amens” from friends. I hope it does the same for you.

“Praise be to the LORD, the God of Israel, from everlasting to everlasting. Let all the people say, Amen!Praise the LORD” Psalms 106:48

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Suffering

17 Wednesday Feb 2010

Posted by Dianna in suffering

≈ 2 Comments

I have to share this blog posting from a friend who is a missionary in Mozambique. God has been teaching me about suffering this year. I’m definitely looking at it differently, but this is a perspective I don’t experience.

“There are days when I really feel sorry for myself. Days when I feel like I have had to suffer…..because I was SO hot in church and the bench was uncomfortable, or I was sick with a virus, or because I live so far away from my family and we miss getting to celebrate together, or because our water is off again for several hours and we had to haul in buckets of water to flush the toilets and I couldn’t shower when I wanted to, or they were out of lunch meat at Shoprite and my kids will have to take pbj sandwiches in their lunch this week.

Then I hear stories of Mozambicans. Stories of real suffering.

And I am shamed and humbled.

Eugenia, age 41 year, died of AIDs on Saturday. She had 5 children. She was so weak and ill in the days leading up to her death that she would cry out in pain when her friends tried to move her. Her eyes appeared to bulge out of her head. She begged for Jesus to take her. She knew Jesus and assured her friends that she would see Him soon.

She is not from this province, so besides her alcoholic husband, she had no one. Her church family had been caring for her. Her oldest child has a child of her own. Her youngest child is about 2 1/2 and is probably HIV positive.

After her funeral, church family came to bring food and other items for the family. Some brought a few coins, others a bag of sugar or some tea, others some fruit. There was no family to come and take her children. Her church family members aren’t in much better shape, financially, than she was. So there was no roster going around at church to sign up to bring a hot meal to them for the next week. No one bringing frozen casseroles to stick in the freezer.

Here, if you have HIV you are known as “positivo”. Some people will shun you. Eugenia was very involved in her church, where she was loved and accepted. The family of God was her only family here. Sometimes she would come to church and quietly ask a friend for money because she had nothing to feed her children. When she looked thin, her friends would ask if she was eating. “If there’s food there, I eat,” she would answer.

Her church family has taken care of her as well as they could. Sat with her, prayed with her, and given from their meager means. They gave when it looks like to these American eyes that they had nothing themselves to give.

Another young woman, Lily, just had twins last week. She had been hospitalized because of high blood pressure and the babies were finally delivered by c-section. She and the babies left the hospital to return to a tiny house that was filthy and full of mosquitoes. There was no family waiting with welcome signs and a hot meal. No clean bassinets and sweet little baby clothes. No running water with baby bathtubs and sweet smelling baby soaps and shampoos.

We get upset when we lose the remote control to the TV or someone ate the last cookie and we didn’t get one or we run out of toilet paper, or I’m tired and don’t feel like cooking but I have to because going out to eat is not a viable option tonight.

Our houseworker, Lucilia, goes through our garbage on the days she comes to work. If I have thrown away a package of half-eaten, stale cookies, she takes it out. A half -a loaf of moldy bread, goes in her bag. Not for her family to eat – she and her husband have good, steady jobs – she gives it to her neighbors who have nothing. I have a package of cookies in my pantry right now that my kids don’t like. So it sits there going stale. Lucilia’s neighbors don’t have the luxury of turning down food. They’ll eat anything and be glad to get it.

So the next time I feel like I’m suffering, I hope the Lord kicks me in the tail again, like He did this morning when I heard these stories, so that I can stop and count my many, many blessings.”

Borrowed with permission from Angie

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