This morning I asked God” Why?” and He said “Die to self”. Pretty loud and clear, no question in my mind that that was God talking
Die to self in a very real way means giving up what I want. It means giving up me. In this day and age I really struggle with that. Would God ask me to give up my dreams? Wouldn’t He want to enable me to accomplish them? Isn’t He there to ensure my happiness and prosperity? He wants me to”be myself” or have goals and dreams, to reach for the stars and grab all of life that I can…..right? The more I think about it the more I realize that God calls me to fill His goals for me. That cannot be a popular thought for most people seeking fulfillment in Christianity. I am a product of my environment which tells me that all God wants is for me to be happy. I know it could stir controversy to say this but I don’t think that is the case. Die to self. To all my hopes and desires. To give them all up in search of something better than I can imagine. I feel like that is what God is saying to me. Give it all up Dianna, so I can do things for you that you can’t even begin to wish for. Things that make your dreams seem puny and watered down. How do I argue with that? How do I tell God that isn’t what I want? That “I’m happy with my little box of dreams God, don’t mess with them, thank you very much, but please just give me the ordinary life I wish for.”
I can’t do that. I can’t tell God I want my very ordinary life instead of His great one. I choose to die to self so that I can have my very best self.